The Cancer of Control

Sometimes I think we are sick, with a deep and deadly disease that sends its tendrils out into every bit of potentially healthy tissue and infects it. Normally functioning cells are replaced by cells that are devoted to reproducing themselves as quickly and widely as possible, totally uncaring as to the damage caused to the whole body as a result. I am not talking about the Ebola epidemic in West Africa, nor am I talking about a medically diagnosed tumor be it breast, brain, or bone. Rather I am talking about a relational disease that is far more widespread, I refer to it as the “cancer of control.”

This type of relational cancer works in individuals to keep them from being fully persons in relationships with others. It works its procrustean power poison in all types of relationships be they marital, familial, occupational, educational, or governmental. The church is not immune to this disease and in fact, is a place where it thrives. This has happened throughout history as fallen humanity has struggled to exercise dominion in the world without surrendering itself to the higher authority of a loving and redemptive God.

There is nothing wrong with exercising God-given authority within the scope of our position and context if we have not given ourselves absolute authority. We must recognize that we too are under the authority of God. And he has modeled humble leadership for us in many ways, most profoundly in the life and ministry of Jesus Christ. I have always been impressed that while the disciples would quarrel amongst themselves over who was the greatest while a Roman centurion (who knew about having authority and also being under authority) could immediately and humbly recognize that true authority was in Jesus, and submit himself to it.

In Matthew 8, after appealing for help for his paralyzed servant and receiving Jesus' pledge to come and heal him, the centurion gave an answer that amazed even Jesus,  

But the centurion replied, “Lord, I am not worthy to have you come under my roof, but only say the word, and my servant will be healed. ⁹ For I too am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. And I say to one, ‘Go,’ and he goes, and to another, ‘Come,’ and he comes, and to my servant, ‘Do this,’ and he does it.” ¹⁰ When Jesus heard this, he marveled and said to those who followed him,

“Truly, I tell you, with no one in Israel have I found such faith…” (8:8-10)

And Jesus concludes this pericope by saying in v.13,  “Go; let it be done for you as you have believed.” I think it is good for us to notice the obvious fact that it was not because of the centurion’s ability to control the situation, but in response to his belief—his trust—that Jesus was enough for the situation that Jesus was amazed. Our situational control and great works are not what Jesus is looking for…but our childlike and reasoned trust is. 

When we are afraid and insecure we try to control our environment more than ever…and that includes the people around us. However, the collateral damage of our tendency to control can be catastrophic. May the Lord give us faith like the centurion, that we might humble ourselves instead of demanding, love generously instead of acting in fear, and make our pleas for others truly out of empathy for the sake of others and not for ourselves. This needs to be applied collectively not just as individuals.

The centurion in Capernaum knew something about the mutuality of authority that kept him from becoming a controlling person. It is something that as Paul addresses the responsibility we have in our various relationships, he speaks to those who have power, “Masters, treat your bondservants justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven.” (Colossians 4:1) And the Apostle John addressed the root cause of the cancer of control, and its cure, when he wrote, ^“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:18-19)

Let us humble ourselves rather than exalt ourselves. Let us love because we have been loved by Jesus. Let us trust all our pressing concerns into his care rather than our command. Let us see the Lord’s power at work!

“And the servant was healed at that very moment.” (Matthew 8:13)